Edwards
"Hence we may learn that whatever changes a godly man passes through, he is happy because God, who is unchangeable, is his chosen portion. Though he meets with temporal losses, and is deprived of many, yea, of all his temporal enjoyments, yet God, whom he prefers before all, still remains and cannot be lost. While he stays in this changeable, troublesome world he is happy, because his chosen portion, on which he builds as his main foundation for happiness, is above the world, and above all changes. And when he goes into another world, still he is happy because that portion yet remains. Whatever he is deprived of, he cannot be deprived of his chief portion; his inheritance remains sure to him. Could worldly-minded man find a way to secure to themselves those earthly enjoyments on which they mainly set their hearts, so that they could not be lost nor impaired while they live, how great would they account the privilege, though other things which they esteem in a lesser degree were liable to the same uncertainty as they now are! Whereas now those earthly enjoyments on which men chiefly set their hearts are often most fading. But how great is the happiness of those who have chosen the Fountain of all good, who prefer Him before all things in heaven or on earth, and who can never be deprived of Him to all eternity!"Jonathan Edwards, from his sermon "God the Best Portion of the Christian" on Psalm 73:25 "Whom have I in heaven but Thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire besides Thee."
he lived in tents
Last week our family went on vacation to Virginia. We stayed at my aunt and uncle's house in the mountains (thank you Aunt Nancy and Uncle Larry!). It was GORGEOUS up there! So cool (relatively speaking!) and green and hilly. As we drove through the twisting mountain roads, I exclaimed (as I always seem to every time I go anywhere north of Georgia) - "Why, exactly do I live in Florida?!" I've decided that after I go to Thailand for a few years, I'm definitely moving to Tennessee or North Carolina. (Or perhaps Oregon...I was reading
Blue Like Jazz all week and found myself daydreaming of living in green, lumpy places. : ) Anyway, I'll try and post pictures so you all can see exactly what I'm talking about.
This trip was especially meaningful because it included all and only my immediate family (excepting my brother-in-law, who was unable to come with us) - the last trip with all of us before I move. The last time we went on a family trip with just us, it was before my older sister got married (which was 8 years ago!). As we were headed up, my dad told me, "You know, Catherine, this trip is for you" - MY trip before I leave home. And I couldn't have asked for a better, more precious gift.
My family has been hounding me this past month for ideas of what I want for my birthday (which was several weeks ago) and I've had the hardest time coming up with a birthday list this year. It's not that there aren't things that I would like to have, it's just that every belonging of mine seems to be attached with a weight or size (and hence, cost) in my brain as I try and figure out how I'm going to get it all in a few suitcases to take across the ocean. I'm already stressed as I look at my room and office, trying to figure out how on earth I'm going to take or ship the things I'll need and then what on earth to do with the rest in the meantime. My poor hope chest that is filled with linens and tea cups and small kitchen appliances that I "hoped" to one day use in my own apartment or home will now be set aside for another few years. The thought of adding another physical possession to the lot is almost more burdensome than it is a joy.
I've been memorizing Hebrews 11 this spring and have been especially struck by the testimony of Abraham to the worth of following Christ:
"By faith, Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. By faith, he made his home in the promised land, like a stranger in a foreign country; he lived in tents, as did Isaac and Jacob, who were heirs with him of the same promise. For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God."
Every phrase speaks so personally to where I am right now. I've had the phrase "he lived in tents" going through my head all during this packing and shipping process. At first, when I read that, I asked myself, "What is our modern-day version of living in tents?" I don't think it's just talking about RVs (though I suppose that could be part of it). It seems to speak of a life lived in constant movement or change of location, the exact opposite of being "settled down" - like living out of suitcases or boxes or something. And that's where I feel like I am now.
How do I live this way - especially being one who is so in love with home? Like Abraham - by faith - with my eyes looking ever forward to that glorious, blessed, promised city that DOES have foundations. The city where my Jesus lives. One day I will be there with Him and all the moving and upheaval will be over, and I can settle in for all eternity to delight in my Savior and all His awesomeness.
On Jordan's stormy banks I stand
And cast a wishful eye
To Canaan's fair and happy land
Where my possessions lie.
All o'er those wide extended plains
Shines one eternal day;
There God the Son forever reigns
And scatters night away.
No chilling winds, nor poisonous breath
Can reach that healthful shore;
Sickness, sorrow, pain and death
Are felt and feared no more
When shall I reach that happy place,
And be forever blest?
When shall I see my Father's face,
And in His bosom rest?
I am bound, I am bound, I am bound for the promised land.
Better beginning?
It's taken me a few days now to decide how to properly start my blog-writing adventure. The first post was pretty pathetic, if I do say so myself, but I've been having a hard time coming up with another introduction. It's not so much that I have nothing to say (anyone who knows me would have a hard time imagining that that could ever be true!) - it's more that I have NO IDEA who my audience for this blog will ultimately be. It's so weird writing, knowing that very different people from all my very different "worlds" (not to mention people I don't even know yet!) could at some time type in my blog address and read about my day to day life. So how do I write about it? The only conclusion I can come up with is that I must (and can only be) myself. But what "Catherine" do I act and communicate like? We'll see how this ends up...
At the risk of sharing too personal of thoughts at the get go - can I just say that I love Jesus so very, very much?! I must confess that I am bursting tonight. : ) My Savior has been so kind and real to me this evening. He is truly the only One who can meet my needs - and He does it in a most intimate and REAL way. I love it most when He meets my needs through His word. That's what He did when I prayed and read my Bible tonight. He amazed me again by turning my exact cries of desperate need spoken TO Him into precious words of comfort and hope FROM Him - by directing my study to words that He spoke through His prophets hundreds of years ago. Only a Sovereign, Eternal God could do something like that - and only a Tender-hearted, Loving One would.
So very simple, but the song in my heart tonight:
I love Thee, I love Thee, I love Thee, my Lord;
I love Thee, my Savior, I love Thee, my God;
I love Thee, I love Thee, and that Thou dost know;
But how much I love Thee my actions will show.
I'm happy, I'm happy, O wondrous account!
My joys are immortal, I stand on the mount;
I gaze on my treasure and long to be there,
With Jesus and angels and kindred so dear.
O Jesus, my Savior, with Thee I am blest,
My life and salvation, my joy and my rest;
Thy name be my theme, and Thy love be my song;
Thy grace shall inspire both my heart and my tongue.
O, who's like my Savior? He's Salem's bright King;
He smiles and He loves me and helps me to sing;
I'll praise Him, I'll praise Him with notes loud and clear,
While rivers of pleasure my spirit shall cheer.
I'm online!
Just trying this whole blog-thing out to see how it works. If you're logging on to find my new blog, you've come to the right place. ; )
